Infertility counselling

From a very early age we are taught that having children is as natural as breathing and parenthood is shown as the ultimate fulfilling experience.  For young girls, this is lovingly taught to us through our earliest toys and games, don’t you remember your first baby doll?

Then in adolescence the shift changes to a focus on protected sex and we are bombarded with information about how easy it is to become pregnant and how we must protect ourselves from such things until a time when we are ready.  Except, what if that isn’t true for all of us? What happens when this system fails and we are unable to conceive? Or what if we are able to conceive but cannot carry to term?

By definition infertility is the inability to reproduce naturally and this in itself can be a very difficult truth to come to terms with, but the fact is it happens to millions of couples here in the UK and worldwide.  It is estimated that in the UK 1 in 7 couples will experience infertility issues, this is approximately 3.5 million people! (NHS, 2017).  The psychological effects of not being able to get or stay pregnant can be absolutely devastating for me and women.

newborn hand

As long as there is the tiniest, wildest chance, I can’t give up.

Pink flower in cupped hands

There’s no telling how many miles you will have to run, while chasing your dreams…

– Author unknown

If you are experiencing primary infertility, you might be feeling like you are broken and this can be so incredibly painful.  Or what if you are experiencing secondary infertility and you have experienced a healthy pregnancy in the past but it’s just not happening for you this time.  Or what if you are a same sex couple that is looking at starting a family but it just feels hopeless, frustrating and confusing!

Then come the questions about the future like, should we keep trying? should we seek professional help? Do I have to give up? No matter your personal situation this can be very distressing time in your life and cause all sorts of physical,  personal and relational upset.

However, while infertility is probably not what you chose, there is good news… this is not the end of the road.  This may not be what you planned but there is hope and their are options available to you and this is exactly where counselling can help.

Confidential

Confidentiality is at the core of a strong therapeutic relationship, along with trust and willingness to engage from both client and counsellor

Safe Space

I endeavour to offer you a warm and welcoming space that feels safe to explore the furthermost corners of your life

Autonomy

I value each client as a unique and autonomous individual, we work at your pace!

Respect

Respect is a core component of any truly trusting relationship and always respect the courage that it takes to reach out to another

how can counselling help?

Infertility counselling can be used as a way to explore the complexity of this particular life experience and the roller-coaster of emotion that is associated with these issues.

Individual counselling or couples counselling can always be useful in working through these feelings, but if you are in a couple it is important to remember that you are not on your own and your partner will be experiencing difficulty as well, even if it looks a bit different to your personal experience of it.  In counselling we can work through the feelings of loss and grieflook for techniques to cope with the stress, and find ways to help you be able to deal with the rest of your life that is inevitably still going to require your time and attention.

I can help you understand the things that you have control over and the things that you don’t, and I can also help you set new goals or re-evaluate old ones and we can explore the different avenues of family building together.  Together we can explore the feelings of inadequacy, guilt, blame, shame, sadness or depression that you may be experiencing as a result of your fertility issues.

newborn hand

I am half agony, half hope…

– Jane Austen

Pink flower in cupped hands

Once you chose hope, anything is possible

– Christopher Reeve

what is Infertility counselling

Support counselling…

is used to explore coping strategies and the practical issues involved with fertility treatment at various stages throughout the process.  

Therapeutic counselling…

is used to work through the profound issues surrounding the clients personal situation, disappointments, or the potentiality of treatment not working and can be a place to explore other alternatives.

Implications counselling…

is a safe place to explore the long-term implications of treatment for the patient and their family, specifically around the significance of using donated gametes (eggs, sperm, or embryos).   

I’d love to hear from you…

Please don’t suffer in silence, help is only a phone call away! I am always available by text or email as well.