Let me set the scene, it started off as a good day! A much-needed day off, a day for rest and self-care  all alone pottering around my home.  I got a cup of tea and sat down in front of the fire, phone in hand, to ‘catch up’ on my social media feeds before moving on to other jobs (or so I thought).  My mood was good, I felt happy and relaxed.  Although, after some mindless scrolling I noticed physical shift in my body and became very aware of how my thoughts began to change.  It didn’t take long before I realised that the muscles in my neck and shoulder felt tense, I noticed a bit of sadness, frustration and even a little of anger as I saw the news of the world flashing in front of my eyes.

I could not believe the reaction I was having to my social media!  Let’s be honest here, while it is a valid form of communication, it is rarely a reliable news source. I put my phone down and went about my morning, but kept coming back and scrolling just to see if anything new had appeared in the past hour, this is ridiculous right? The underlying feeling of sadness and general anxiety stayed with me all day and I feel these were the very feelings bringing me back to my new feeds.

Eventually, in the afternoon, I came across a post that was very much in line with my true core values of kindness, simple living, love and an overwhelming sense of relief came over me.  Once relaxed, I was able to think clearly and was reminded that I am in control of my own mental well-being, I may notice things around me and be aware of current affairs, even horrified, but I am in control of my own happiness, and my well-being is not directly related to the media I consume.

My mindless scrolling had a serious effect on how I was relating to my life on that day.  It really got me thinking about what sort of long-term damage could be done if that warning bell hadn’t gone off in my head?  Or what happens with people who suffer with chronic anxiety or depression? And what effects will this have on the developing minds of young people?  All questions that are constantly being researched and evaluated by researches and governments, but we still have so little answers for.

Why does it hurt?

Research is increasingly showing that heavy social media usage is associated with poor mental health. It contributes to poor sleep patterns, poor self-esteem and  provides unreliable forms of social comparison.  In addition to these physiologic issues I think it is seriously affecting how we interact socially and affects our ability to regulate our own social behaviours.

For example, it gives us the opportunity to speak without having to take responsibility for how those thoughts and opinions may affect others.  It is simply too easy to say things on social media, from the safety of our own living room… I think the term is ‘keyboard warrior’.  I feel like this dehumanizes the person we are directing our comments to and makes it far too easy to say things that we would never say to a person face to face.  Where are the repercussions?  We say it, then log off, but where is the accountability?

This is the future of communication! Scary right?!

Went to my friends for a little help!

So, I went to my friends on Facebook for a little help, I asked them if they’d kicked the Facebook habit and then why they came back?  The responses were amazing and so varied!  People use it for business, home education, to keep up with family in different countries, to stay in touch with busy friends, and to gain information, but mostly it seems to be used to remain close to people they care about.  They also all seemed to agree that you put on there what you want to get out of it, so if you see lots of negative things or people, then hide it or unlike.  Some people had really great ideas on maintaining their own online well-being, if you add a person to social media then take a person off, or just un-follow the people who you love but drive you a little crazy, or simply take it off your home screen!

I guess I came to the conclusion that overall I’ll get out of Facebook what I put into it and personal restraint is the key to maintaining balance.  So I’ll keep liking your cute babies, funny memes and using it as a way to reach out to strangers and spread mental health awareness.  I suppose, learning how to communicate this way is just something new to me and something I am still learning how to do…I’ll forever be learning.